We're looking at you, Lessebo loveseat. Gear Live graphics, logos, designs, page headers, button icons, videos, articles, blogs, forums, scripts and other service names are the trademarks of Gear Live Inc. You play it once, just to see how it is, and then the whole thing just grows on you. Think Resident Evil meets Half Life 2. It is safe to say that the product will be rebranded if and when it hits the states. This game was hated by everyone who reviewed it, yet it still managed to get a release on the two years after first being launched. It's from Korea and is now on the shelves as Touch Dictionary.
But if you want to spend your free time pretending to purvey branded pharmaceuticals, you go right ahead. . Oh, how many English speakers ordered copies of this game, oh how many hugely, hugely disappointed men saw their erection wilt under screen after screen displaying nothing but Korean words. Is it from a simpler time? It was released only in South Korea. The tongue-in-cheek title may have killed its chances of success, but it reflected the innocence with which the game approached mindless violence. Which, to be fair, would be a hilariously disturbing form of psychological warfare.
Seriously, what the heck kind of nonsensical rules for content does Japan have in place that a game like this, containing material that would be grounds for immediate arrest and a long-term prison sentence in America, is allowed to make it out to market? We're not going to rip on this game for anything more than its unnaturally long title and hilarious innuendo. It's to be expected that a prominent gun club doesn't want to condone the shooting of innocent passers-by. Between its name and design, we wouldn't be surprised if more than one child mistook it for a portable toilet. But of course it's simply mind-numbingly dull. Most third grade graduates are aware of this.
This is the kind of manure our parents lettuce vegetate with in the 80s -- rotten concepts with leaf-thin plots and stupid carrotters. Think of the lawsuits and black eyes your barber would avoid if he could instead say that he was rubbing a load of refreshing Q. Just ask Reebok spokesman Nelly, seen here in a rare moment of not telling women to take off all their clothes. . Not exactly a gaming landmark, the Yes Prime Minister game may be the actual low point of licensed games, a particularly sludgy barrel to be scraping. Today, sponsors our look at some real products out there that are every bit as laughably retarded.
. Maybe we need more overt genitalia gags. Reebok introduced this women's running shoe in 1995, a time when naming your sneaker was as important to marketing as curing cancer is to science. First, the product's name is an imperative - it commands the consumer to drop whatever he's doing to repel mosquitoes. This wonderfully tasteless game was always for the Bart Simpsons of the world.
The tongue-twistingly long title for this game does nothing but make us look back on 1989 with fond memories, and worry that we want the pixellated lady to remove her. If Billy was a ninja, we'd probably pay more attention. He'd make a mess of you, unless your surname is Courage, Extreme or Nukem. And that birthmark will be somewhere under their underwear. Now arriving at 3 on our countdown, here's a game so extremely inappropriate that you've no doubt heard of it before -- Doki Doki Majo Shinpan, also known as the witch-touching game. It had some decent courses, passable graphics and considering it was 1994, fairly good ball physics. .
There's no chance that a game like this will ever make it to market here. Think Microsoft Flight Simulator, only with buses. It just wasn't made to be something that you could play with for hours on end. . At absolutely no point in this game could you hug ogres, so its title is nothing but false advertising and misleading marketing. We scoured the for the origin of this dentifrice's imbecilic name and didn't find an explanation.
Regardless of the cult following, Wild Woody has to be one of the silliest game titles ever made. No approved descriptions in database. . But Tactics Ogre was a popular series, with Let Us Cling Together the seventh instalment, despite the dearth of beastly bow-chicka-wow-wow. And while we're on the subject, let's go ahead and mention. There's some chaos to be had, but disappointingly not in the anatomical region the title so coyly alludes to. In the competitive world of gaming, where removing heads with axes and running over prostitutes is rather vanilla, a gun game with no mindless violence could be considered refreshing.
We're no marketing wizards, but wouldn't have been way less awkward simply to name the brand Q. It's just no -- no going near it, no even thinking about buying it. He plays a bit of golf and between holes he hurts other ninjas and various animals. Yep, this is one weird-ass game. On the bottom screen, the user enters the word he or she wants to translate in the source language, using the on-screen keyboard.